"Ohmigosh!"

My emotions have been pretty even-keeled lately. In my head, I know I'm leaving for a really poor, foreign country this weekend, but I have not felt nervous or extremely excited either. Sure, I've been telling everyone I'm excited, but what am I going to tell people? - "Actually, I'm pretty indifferent about this whole thing and it won't be until the day it happens that it all really hits me, but that's pretty typical with my personality so there's no need to worry. How are you doing?" Probably not the best answer.

Anyway, tonight I had a twinge of, let's call it "Ohmigosh!" I wasn't unbelievably nervous, nor was I really sad, freaked out or overjoyed - I was just: "Ohmigosh!"

I suppose "Ohmigosh!" could be described as follows: first, there's just a general pause in whatever it is you're doing, then there's almost a twitch of realization (eyes open wide, head cocks up, brain swishes around a bit), then a sort of half-open smile appears on your face (I would say more a smile for yourself when nobody is around as opposed to a "cheese" smile or a "Hey! I haven't seen you in so long. I love your new haircut!" kind of smile), then a self-affirming nod, and then within less than 5 seconds you're back to doing whatever you were doing in the first place.

So, picture this scene. I'm in my room packing and simultaneously watching a rerun of "Absolutely Fabulous" on BBC America (caveat: that show is hilarious!), when all of a sudden, after a brief thought of "do I really need to be packing so many pairs of black socks?" I suddenly had my "Ohmigosh!" moment. It was thrilling, truly. But, as you've read in the previous paragraph, being completely faithful to the definition of an "Ohmigosh!" moment, within just a few seconds I was back to folding shirts and talking to myself in a British accent.

And now, my "Ohmigosh!"* moment has led me to this post and the realization that I leave in just 4 days. It's becoming real and I am so happy about that.

*By the way, "Ohmigosh!" should be read quickly and slurred together as opposed to a typical, "Oh, my gosh!" It really adds to the intensity and momentary urgency of the feeling.